February 11, 2010

In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris

You just know this blog wouldn't feel right without Ol' Chuck on it.

Remember the "Walker: Texas Ranger" lever that Conan O' Brien had? I sure do :)

...and the whole Chuck Norris joke thing online is legendary now, and I'd have to say it's one of the most consistently satisfying sources of humor I've ever seen on the net.

A sampling of a few good ones I've come across;
  • Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse-kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.
  • When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.
  • How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it!
  • The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
Do you have a favorite Chuck Norris joke?


  1. Greaaat!
    In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

  2. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

    Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

    When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

    Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

    Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

    Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

    There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.


  3. Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.

  4. Classic!

    Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer... too bad he never cries!

  5. Awesome! Great addition to your gallery.

    My favorite has always been -

    "Chuck Norris once killed a bird by throwing it off a cliff."

  6. When Bruce Banner gets mad he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad he turns into Chuck Norris.

    Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer

    Chuck Norris doesn't swim in water, the water swims around him.

    Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

    Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter.

  7. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

    Chuck Norris can speak Braille.

    Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land.

  8. Chuck Norris is a best bizarre cowboy form the history of movies, in Uruguay I see in Tv and smile and more smile from his adventures.

  9. Two Words: Jack Bauer!

  10. In his spare time, Chuck Norris likes to knit sweaters. And By knit, I mean punch and by sweaters, I mean babies.

  11. awesome. but the real chucky has only one facial expression...

  12. Chuck Norris does not jump. He pushes the earth down.

  13. LOL My mother and sister used to laugh at me, because I knew the words to the Walker Texas Ranger theme song. Some sitcom he did a guest appearance that centered on Walker Texas Ranger...all I remember about the sitcom is it came on channel 9 here.

    As always fantastic work, Dean!

  14. I hate Chuck Norris jokes.

    It didn't take long for them to get old.

  15. Chuck Norris is Batman on the nights

  16. you gotta see this

  17. If Chuck Norris walks through the rain, he does not get wet. The rain get's Chuck Norris.

  18. Chuck Norris was kill by Bruce Lee

  19. Yeah but the fact is that Chuck Is still alive KIDD SONIC :D

  20. In fact, Chuck Norris dead 10 years ago, but the Death can't tell it to him.

  21. One of my tags is one that I made up: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story. One time Chuck Norris ate a turtle and when he crapper it out it was 6 ft tall and knew karate.

  22. ninjas want to grow up to be like chuck norris.but usually end up getting killed by chuck norris.

  23. The open half hour of the movie Saving Private Ryan is loosely based on a game of dodgeball Chuck Norris played as a child.